For Those of You Longing for Love
It begins with you.
Love. It’s a word filled with promise, passion, and sometimes, pain. I don’t often write about love, but over the years, many of you have shared your deep desire for partnership, and now feels like the right time to share a bit about my journey.
Rumi once said, “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” This resonates deeply with me. Love is not something we chase—it's something we allow, but only after doing the inner work required to make room for it.
I was married, and divorced, quite young; and at 37 I found myself a single mother to two magnificent boys, ages 7 and 10.
A few years later, after taking some time to find my footing post-divorce, I entered a new relationship and spent the next decade navigating the complexities of blending families. It was an incredible experience, full of growth and learning. When that relationship ended, it felt like the natural conclusion for both of us.
That chapter in my life closed just as my children were leaving home. I sold the house where I raised them, downsized my belongings, re-homed our beloved dog, and found myself in an 800-square-foot beach house, ready for a new beginning.
It was then that I realized my perspective on love and partnership had evolved as I had grown older and moved through different ages and stages of life; and the next decade became a journey back to me—falling in love with myself and creating a life rich in joy, peace, and adventure.
I worked hard to find contentment, my inner voice of truth and what really matters most to me.
I hear it often from my friends, “you are so lucky to living your best life”,
And they’re right, I am living my best life.
Yet, it wasn’t luck that made it happen; and it wasn’t easy. The path was filled with uncertainty, fear, and many significant decisions. But it was also exhilarating. I discovered the immense difference between being alone and being lonely. I thrived in my solitude, yet I still longed for love and companionship.
The key difference? I no longer needed it to define my happiness.
Love is beautiful and magical.
It can also be challenging. But unless we cultivate a life that brings us joy, fulfillment, and inner peace, love won’t, and can’t, flourish. A healthy relationship requires two people who are happy, healthy, and whole—individually. It’s not a partner’s job to fill our voids, and it’s our responsibility to be whole before entering a relationship.
In my coaching work, I meet countless women who long for love, but often their yearning is entangled with a deeper desire to find what truly makes them happy.
Love, intimacy and building a strong and healthy relationship is hard. It requires courage, patience and honesty with ourselves, and each other. It challenges us to face our fears, to hold boundaries and to show up day after day as the best version of who we are. We need to communicate transparently and speak our truth, even when our voice shakes. And we need to be curious; open to self awareness and how we can grow.
After a decade of reconnecting with myself and getting clear on what I want and need in a partner, I found love again.
This time, it’s different.
I have entered this partnership as a 57 year old woman who absolutely loves who she is and the life she has created for herself.
I am thrilled to be building a new relationship; one where I am not only invested in the fullest expression of love, but also committed to nurturing, honoring and protecting the relationships I have with my family, my incredible women friends, my passions and hobbies, my business, the impact I want to have in the world, and my time alone.
This love isn’t filling a gap in my life—it’s broadening and enhancing it.
You deserve love. We all do.
And it is out there waiting for you.
Yet, to claim it, you must do the work of returning to the truth of who you are,
to loving and caring for yourself,
and to designing a life that brings you joy and contentment.
If you’re longing for love, remember—it starts with you.
This post was written just for you, but you could have read it sooner if you were on my email list.