Navigating Divorce
A Journey to Rediscovering Who You Really Are
How My Divorce Became the Catalyst for Transformation and Why You Can Navigate This Journey, Too
As I sit here and reflect, it’s hard to believe that nearly 20 years have passed since I went through my divorce. Back then, it felt like the end—an ending to the life I thought I knew, the dreams I held, and the family I had hoped to build. Divorce brings with it a mix of emotions: sadness, fear, anger, and sometimes a sense of failure. It’s a massive life transition, and like many, I wasn’t prepared for what lay ahead.
But looking back now, I see it was also a beginning. It was the start of a journey I couldn’t yet understand—a journey that would challenge me to my core, but ultimately lead me to a life filled with joy, growth, and purpose I never could have imagined. Divorce became my path to rediscovering who I am, a catalyst that spurred me to become the woman I was meant to be.
The Early Days of My Journey
When my marriage ended, I felt lost, uncertain of what my life would look like. The future felt like a vast unknown, one I had no map for. Each day was a mix of emotions—some days felt liberating, while others left me overwhelmed by sadness. There was no one-size-fits-all approach, no guidebook to tell me what to expect, but there were small glimmers of hope.
In those early days, I realized I wasn’t the only one feeling this way. Many women I spoke to were either considering divorce, going through it, or trying to rebuild afterward. And we all shared something in common: we wanted to feel whole, confident, and capable of building a new life for ourselves.
That’s when I felt a deep calling to support other women on this journey. I started my business, which was then named The D Spot, to create a space for women to find strength, community, and hope as they navigated the complexities of divorce.
But over the years, I found that my work was about so much more than divorce. It was about helping women step into the fullness of who they were becoming—guiding them through one of life’s messiest transitions and supporting them as they envisioned what life could be after the storm.
Divorce as a Catalyst for Transformation
Divorce is unlike any other transition. It isn’t just about ending a relationship; it’s about reshaping your entire life. Sometimes, it happens so slowly that you never see it coming. Other times, it feels like a sudden, jarring shock. Regardless of how it happens, divorce is life-changing, and often, it’s hard to imagine what comes next.
If you’re in the midst of divorce, maybe you know the feeling: the uncertainty, the sadness, the stress. The holidays can amplify these emotions, stirring up a sense of loss or even loneliness. You may find yourself wondering, “Will this emptiness ever go away?” And it’s okay to feel that way.
What I want you to know is that you are at the beginning of a powerful, transformative journey. When I say this, I don’t mean to make it sound simple—because it’s not. There will be days that test you, days that hurt, days where you feel every painful emotion. But there will also be days when you feel a sense of freedom, an open road ahead of you, and maybe even excitement about what could come next.
Through my experience, I’ve come to understand that divorce can be a doorway to reinvention. It’s an invitation to rediscover who you are, separate from the role you played in your marriage. And yes, there will be moments when it all feels uncertain, but if you remain open to the process, it will lead you toward the life you were always meant to live.
Embracing the Journey Ahead
If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that moving forward doesn’t mean you have to have it all figured out. So often, we think we need all the answers, but really, it’s about taking one step at a time. The path to healing isn’t linear; it’s winding, and there will be both highs and lows. I’ve been there, and I know how tempting it is to want to skip to the “good part” where everything makes sense.
But this journey isn’t just about reaching a destination; it’s about embracing each step, each lesson, and each discovery along the way. As women, we often put ourselves last, pouring our energy into others—children, partners, careers—while neglecting our own needs. Divorce, in its own way, offers us the chance to turn inward, to ask, “What do I want?” and “What do I need?”
If you’re standing at this crossroad, let me say this: You are allowed to feel every emotion. It’s okay to cry, to feel anger, to mourn the life you thought you’d have. And it’s equally okay to feel hopeful, to dream, and to believe in a brighter future. You don’t have to navigate this journey alone. Lean on those who care for you, and most importantly, lean on yourself. You have more resilience and strength than you realize.
Reimagining What’s Possible
As I look back, I realize that divorce was where my life truly began. It allowed me to strip away the expectations I had carried, to let go of the “shoulds” that had weighed me down. It gave me the chance to reimagine who I wanted to be, what I wanted to do, and how I wanted to live.
Today, nearly two decades later, my life looks nothing like I once envisioned—and I couldn’t be more grateful. I’ve created a life that is fulfilling, joyful, and aligned with who I am. And I know it wouldn’t have been possible without the experiences that shaped me during and after my divorce.
This isn’t to say that divorce is easy or without pain. It’s to say that there’s a life waiting for you on the other side, a life filled with possibilities you may not yet see. So, if you’re in a place of uncertainty, remember that each day brings you closer to that life. Embrace the journey, with all its messiness and beauty.
You Are Not Alone
As we move into a New Year, I want you to know how grateful I am that you’re here, reading these words. I think you are amazing, and I am deeply honored to walk beside you, even if it’s through words on a page. Divorce can feel isolating, but you are never alone.
In the coming year, I’ll be releasing a new, free guide for women navigating divorce—a resource that I hope will offer guidance, comfort, and support. As you continue on your path, know that I am here, with my hand outstretched, ready to support you however I can. And as you look forward, embrace this journey with confidence, with courage, and with the knowledge that there is an incredible future waiting for you.
If you need a reminder along the way, remember this: you are strong, you are resilient, and you are loved. Together, we’ll face whatever comes next.
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